elibe | damaged

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damaged

inspired by this comic!

(It's after a particularly rough sortie and after everyone's been looked over and evaluated. Most of them might be able to get by with just some light repairs and rest but some are not as lucky. Rest alone won't be enough and they'll have to go in for more serious repairs. It could take all day at best or more at worst.

Serious repairs are exactly what they sound like-- serious-- but there's always that extra element that makes them a little more hesitant to surrender their true forms and enter the repairs room. Without their swords and reeling from heavy damage, they're perhaps in their most vulnerable state. It's times like this, alone with just their thoughts for company, that their years really begin to catch up with them. For some, it isn't too bad. There are a lucky few who are blessed with shorter histories or brighter lives but the unfortunate truth is that for many of them, the years have not been kind.

But this is their situation! And it can go one of a few ways right now...)

A.

(After some light harassing, Mutsunokami has managed to convince someone to get repairs! Would it help if he went with them? He doesn't mind, really and he'll even hold their hand as they stand in front of the room.)

Ready? (He gives their hand a firm squeeze,) It'll be over before ya know it!

(Or maybe Mutsunokami is the one that's here for heavy repairs. Mutsunokami is one of the luckier swords in question, someone with a shorter and much more pleasant history compared to others. Honestly, he finds repairs more boring than anything. Of course, he uses his blessings to focus on his companion right now. Being stuck in this room sure is boring! Sorry to get you dragged in here with him, heh heh... And sometimes he dozes off because being damaged is exhausting.

Repairs are pleasant enough for him but his damage is a little heavier today than usual. It's not something he's really used to and it shows when he suddenly jerks awake from a short nap, looking around the room in an alert sort of daze before relaxing.

Huh... strange.)

(Wildcard, give me your own prompt, talk to me, maybe theyre both in for repairs or something instead.)

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[There there, he can rest now. He needs to sleep this off in any case, with his temperature rising and the fact that he's easily disturbed by the slightest sound and movement...

But it's okay, she'll keep him company. And it's a good thing too, because that was when she noticed that he's much worse off than she had initially thought, now that his defences are down.]

Ryouma?

[Ah his old master. Mutsunokami often spoke about him, and she knows that no one can be as precious to Mutsunokami as Ryouma, who practically shaped him, was.

That kind of memory, if it's hazy from the pain he is suffering now, if he was definitely feverish...

Vietnam pulls the one half of the comforter away from him, cradling his head so she can tug it out from under them, and then crawls in under it, just so she can properly hold him. Away from the thickness of a blanket, close enough so that she can rub his back soothingly.]

Shhh, Mutsnokami. I am here now. [He's hot to the touch, and it would be best to lie him down with a wet towel, she believes. But first, she sees how he responds.] I'm going to move you back to the futon, okay?

( He makes a sound, something like a groan and a whine but he's really in no state to resist. He feels heavy, like his body is more lead than flesh and bone. There's a hand on his back and it feels nice through all of the soreness and heaviness he's feeling. He feels cooler the moment she removes the comforter but he also feels incredibly vulnerable without it and as she rubs at his back, he might make a noise that sounds something like a quiet cry. )

Stay. ( Here? With her? Or with his memories. ) Don't go. Stay here!

( His hands fumble and get tangled but he throws his arms around her, holding her protectively close. )

Just don't go, don't go... ( He's so feverish, he's delirious, ) Who's there? ( In his memory, someone is there. SOmeone is there, slashing and attacking. ) I can't... remember...

( Whispering, )

Why is it hot?

[Well, her plans to get him to his futon are dashed, because she really should be tending to him right now, right here. It seems it's not just physical, but mentally he's been wounded that it needed mending as well.

That grip around her, protective like he would lose her otherwise, she can't help but hold him back, her head pressed to his chest so that he can be sure that he has her entire form in his grip. There, he can't lose her now. But this also puts her in a good position to lift him if need be.

But gently now, let's ease him through this first.]

It's Vietnam. I'm not going anywhere. Mutsunokami, Ryouma's not... [--here. Wait Ryouma? Why is it hot? What was happening in his dream?

Nevertheless, she starts to stand, to encourage him to do the same so that she can pick him up.]

Let's go somewhere cooler.

Edited 2018-08-30 05:08 (UTC)

... Carry myself?

[Taroutachi holds up his hand in front of his face. A big hand. A big body, capable of wielding that big sword...]

Carry myself... I can do that.

[Kashuu sure has a lot of reasons to hate repairs, which means he has a lot of reasons to act like he doesn't - or at least to pretend that his reasons are all shallow, surface-level irritants. "I worked hard on this manicure and I don't want you to see it chipped", or a simple "it's not cute", "it's not fun", whatever the flavor of the day is as it suits him. It's better for people to think he's a fussy sword than for them to realize how many times in an hour he jolts out of unpleasant memories, unguarded and restless when he's alone in the repair room.

But today he isn't, so today he's on guard, working hard to prevent himself from drifting and trying his damndest to keep those little flickers of memory that dance at his vision's edge exactly that - flickers, nothing more. That's why he's pretty attuned to Mutsu, even if he pretends he's not paying much mind. It's better to have something tangible to focus on.

A few beats pass after he snaps awake, in any case. Then:]

If you're that tired, you should reeeally pick a better place to nap.

(He's definitely awake but still on the bleary eyed side. It takes him a moment to realize where he is because it's neither his room or... another place he'd thought he'd been in. The place in his dream is vague the way dreams can be after you've woken up but instead of fading from memory, it becomes gradually more defined.

A dimly lit room, a quiet night, only two people inside.

He looks at Doudanuki who looks as disgruntled now as he had when Mutsu was awake earlier. He can't help but find that a little amusing and he manages an obnoxious grin,)

Why? Were ya bored without me?

(Probably. He's not unfamiliar with Doudanuki's feelings about repairs. He shifts, sitting up straight and tries to give Doudanuki his full attention but there's something tugging at his mind-- those memories he's doing his best to ignore because he knows it's nothing more than just that-- memories.)

[Well, he's not dead if he can be annoying. Doudanuki feel relief, but outwardly he just looks even more surly than before. It's almost as if he's sunk further into the wall if that were possible, arms crossed over his chest and frown deepening.]

I'm bored here whether or not you're awake.

[aka "I WAS NOT WAITING FOR YOU TO WAKE UP, SHUT UP."

But seeing Mutsunokami try to sit up so quickly after waking up from such long repairs, Doudanuki holds up a hand.]

Take it easy. 'M not doin' anything interesting if you need to rest longer.

( It's really just his luck that he ends up in repairs with Kashuu. Even if it's someone he prefers over others, this hadn't made the idea of sharing time with him like this any better. He knew he needed to go in for heavier repairs just like how he knows this is going to go sooner rather than later. Just because he gets along with the Shinsengumi swords now that doesn't mean he wants them to see him at his most vulnerable. But like Kashuu, if he pretends it isn't too big of a deal and can focus on the present instead of the past... surely he can pull out of this without falling apart, right?

He really can't help but to snort and shoot Kashuu a playful sort of smile. He's just trying to keep things light! But they've known each other long enough that Kashuu can probably see through the act and see how tired Mutsu really is, )

Better than here? ( Hah. ) I can think of a few places.

( His own room, for starters. On the veranda in the sunlight. Out in the fields. Under the great cherry tree.

Even if there are a pair of futon in the room for them to use if they get tired enough, Mutsu's opted to stay out of it for now. This room is just... warm. Uncomfortably warm and he wonders how much of it is real and how much of it is just himself working into an uncomfortable fever. Brushing aside his bangs, he tries to cool off his head and focuses on his company instead of his memories, )

Did ya rest any yet? ( Maybe Mutsu was more exhausted because of the nature of his repairs but... doesn't this place get boringly tiresome? ) ... Ya aren't tired?

( Aw, he was waiting for him to wake up. How sweet! He mumbles at Doudanuki's insistence. He doesn't have to get up if he needs to rest? Heh. )

It's hot.

( Under the covers of a futon? He isn't sure. Heavy repairs always make him a little feverish and he wonders what he's feeling right now is that or just him working himself up into a discomforting state.

Shaking himself off with a heavy and tired groan, he props himself up in bed, )

How long was I asleep?

( Is it time to get out of here yet? Wishful thinking. He can feel he still needs more time with how tired and sore his body still feels. )

( There's a voice reaching him through his fever and he whines, trying to focus on that instead of this growing heat he feels. Ryouma's not... he can finish the thought. He's not here. He hasn't been here in a long, long time.

He can feel some sort of force lifting him up and he really doesn't have the strength to resist. He also doesn't have the strength to support himself which means she's bearing his whole weight. Somewhere cooler sounds nice and if someone is promising that, he wants to go. )

Yeah, I don't think anyone would have this place as a first pick.

[Except for maybe the swords with very minimal bad memories to be had?? But who among them even really qualifies, god...

In any case, his head dips forward a little at the question. In truth, he is tired - it's the kind of tiredness that just seems to permeate the repair room sometimes. An exhaustion that isn't just physical. Maybe mostly isn't physical, even. But as always, that's not something he'd even want to discuss with his fellow Shinsengumi swords; he's not going to be the first person to address the big ol' tired elephant in the room.]

I'd rather rest once this is done.

[A surprisingly honest answer, maybe, but it's still said lightly enough that it doesn't have much surface impact. He shoots over a sidelong glance, inspecting Mutsu's face and the mild sheen of sweat on his forehead. Hm.]

--Maybe we could ask aruji to add some things in here that'd make it a better place to nap. Like a mini-fridge.

[He almost let his hackles raise at that mumbling, but then he remembered that they're both hurt and getting in a fight right now - while stress-relieving - probably isn't the best idea. He himself is still healing despite his stubborn refusal to sleep it off like most swords. Others had things to look back on, but Doudanuki had confusing fragments and memories that didn't belong to him. He preferred to say awake and bored instead.

Doudanuki shrugged in response to Mutsu's question and looked up at the clock that continued to count down the time until they could leave.]

A few hours, not long.

[They were still stuck in here for awhile, but at least there was some food brought in. He jerks his head toward the small tray left near the head of Mutsu's bed topped with a few onigiri and some tea.]

They brought something if you wanna eat.

( Urashima and like 2 other people... )

A break from your our, huh?

( It sounds silly when he says it out loud but he can relate. When this is all over, he might need a nap. Or maybe he'll throw himself at some of the tantou just to be active again. Is it possible to feel both exhausted to the bone and restless enough you want to break out and run? Because that's how he feels.

Kashuu's suggestion gets him a quiet glance. It's not just a casual one, is it? He knows because Kashuu isn't as silly as he acts. He'd suggested a fridge because he's noticed something, hasn't he? And what else is there to see in this room but each other and he knows his own condition right now. Kashuu's noticed, huh? But he won't say as much out loud and for that, Mutsu is grateful. He does, after all, have his pride too.

Before he can make any sort of smart comment to brush it off though, he hears something. There's a loud noise-- a crash?-- outside their room and it sounds like a ruckus. Really? Who's making so much noise outside of this room? Talk about inconsiderate! He grumbles, looking at the door, )

Quiet down.

( Except as far as Kashuu would be concerned, there wasn't any noise at all. )

Edited 2018-09-01 03:10 (UTC)

[Sayo's still holding onto Mutsu's hand until they reach the futon. Sitting down slowly, he let go so he can go under the covers. Logically, it's easier this way. But he still want to hold onto Mutsu's hand a little longer.

Oh, yeah. Before he can, he raise his hand to pull out his hair tie.]

Thank you...

[Mutsu doesn't need to, but Sayo appreciate having someone nearby.]

I want to get better before my brothers return...

[Which is probably unlikely, from what he remembers the timer say for his repairs.]

[He's not feeling well, so this is a lot easier than she thought, being able to move him. He comes with her willingly, so she manages to carry him over, letting him drape all over her smaller body, up until they reach his futon. He's burning up, much more violently than before, and those dreams must have gotten his blood flowing as well.

When they reach his futon, she immediately lies him down, and with the tub of water nearby, possibly used before to try to dress his wounds, she dips a towel into the clear water so that she could try to dab the coolness of water over him. Over his face, his chest, arms and legs, so that he can start to cool down faster.]

This will feel much nicer, no?

( It does feel nicer and it helps him relax a little more, even if he still seems terribly out of it. He doesn't respond right away, fighting back his fever along with his memories. Vaguely, in his haze, he knows that these are all dreams and things that have already passed but it's so hard to not get caught up when he feels so exhausted right now.

He tosses and turns on occasion but eventually he seems to settle and the tension in his body seems to relax. He closes his eyes tight and there's a sound in the back of his throat like a cry beginning to start. When he speaks again, his voice is small, uncertain, nothing like how he usually is, )

They can still fix me... right? ( He opens his eyes, bleary and watery, ) Even if... it's this bad?

( A few hours. Longer than he'd thought it had been. Or was it less? It's hard to tell with the past blurring with the present and making things feel so much longer than they really are. He looks over at the food on the tray and where he would have been quick to help himself, he finds his appetite lacking right now. Even he recognizes that's strange and he frowns.

Instead, he reaches for the tea. The tea pot feels heavy in his hand and he finds himself having to support his arm with his free hand as he pours. Ugh, he's just... really tired. He sets the teapot down heavily, the porcelain clattering loudly and he flinches again. He's never been graceful or particularly gentle when it comes to serving but even this is clunky for him, )

It's so quiet in here...! ( He tries to brush it off, ) And seriously... is it warm to ya?

( Or is it just him? is he starting to get a fever, he wonders?

This whole room is uncomfortable and he can feel himself starting to get on edge, his skin crawling and body becoming more tense. It's small and dark and closed off in here and it's so quiet and even Doudanuki isn't enough of a distraction from the memories blurring at the edge of his conscious-- a dimly lit room, quiet at night-- )

( It's okay because Mutsu isn't going anywhere and when the repairs really start to get underway, Mutsu will be there to hold Sayo's hand again. Right now, though, it's important to get comfortable and prepare for what's going to come, )

Haha! Well, ya'll be better in no time.

( At least, it'll be less time compared to other swords. Once Sayo's in bed, he'll lean over to ruffle the tantou's hair and push his bangs away from his eyes, )

Everything started the moment we got in here. ( The timer has already begun to count down and already, a minute or two has passed. Mutsu's repairs are very light today so really, all he needs is a nap and a little bit of care and he'll be able to roll out just fine! But there's no way he's leaving Sayo alone. ) We're in this together, don't forget that.

That's right.

( This is a better direction they're going in right now and he knows if he can keep it this way, the recovery will go smoother. )

Everyone's waiting for ya so hurry up, Taroutachi. You're tired right now... probably feeling like you're in a dream, right? But when you're ready, ya'll get to walk right outta here and join everyone else.

[Just SHOOTING HIM A LOOK!! Yeah, he needs a break! He needs a break at all hours for all reasons, honestly. Dealing with the entire ordeal that is Getting Repaired is just one of the many reasons he's exhausted constantly... The other reasons all relate to the wildass swords he has to spend his time around.

He's fairly good at navigating, at least. He knows when to dip the hell out of situations just as well as he knows when to leave things unsaid, to voice concerns in softer and subtler ways and know he'll still be understood.

BUT BEFORE HE CAN VOICE ANYTHING ELSE-- Mutsu's... Hm. Kashuu glances toward the door himself, brow furrowing a little.]

...You hear something?

[Not the most surprising thing, considering how strange swords can get during repairs, depending on this or that. It's still unusual for Mutsu, though. At least for what Kashuu knows of him. He strains his hearing anyway, just in case, like he might catch any sound at all. Naturally, there aren't even footfalls. Those who aren't in need of repair usually avoid this place.]

[The futon's soft and warm. Combined with his body's state and the repairs' effects, Sayo just feels really warm right now. It makes him want to drift away into sleep, despite knowing that his memories may surface yet again.]

Yeah.

[Exhaustion from battle is starting to grip at him. His eyes are trying to stay open for just a little longer. Just so he can say a few more words before he let himself sleep.]

I'm tired... I'll sleep soon. [He knows he should. But those memories of the past is making him a little anxious. His hand curl up against Mutsu's.] So thank you for staying...

[His voice lowers, as exhaustion finally got his eyes to close and he drifts away to sleep.]

[He watches as Mutsunokami fumbles his way through getting tea and frowns. He knew the other sword was heavily injured, but he didn't think it would be this bad. Doudanuki doesn't answer right away, but as Mutsu's demeanour grows distant again, fidgeting, he pushes himself up off the ground and uses the motion to disguise a wince of pain.]

Dunno. I'm not the one under the futon.

[Even without enemies, this place has its own dangers lurking inside, and Doudanuki shuffles over to Mutsunokami, trying to hide the limp that still hasn't healed. He makes it over and grumbles as he lowers himself to the ground next to the other sword.]

Your face is pale though. You still need to rest?

[She's going to have to get that fever down, he won't be the only one fighting it. She's here with him, and being lucid, it means she can succeed. He's doing his best, and she's sure of it. At least his questions were beginning to sound a little more like he's aware.

When he speaks, she stops what she's doing for a moment (checking his temperature to see if she needs to give him another wet towel), and takes his hand into hers. With her other hand, she feels over his cheek, partly to check his temperature again, but mostly to give him comfort.]

Of course. They've been trying so hard to fix you, no? You just need to rest and heal, and you'll be healthy in no time.

[And since no one is around to see it...she presses her lips to his forehead, before continuing to fan him a little more, and then dabbing the wet towel at his neck.]

I'll make sure of it, as I won't leave your side. You still have a lot of nice things to show me as well, and I can't do it without you.

( So Kashuu hadn't heard anything? He's aware enough to figure out what that means and he grumbles, brushing a hand through his hair and holding his head in his hands. )

It's not real. ( He knows that much and he wonders if he's saying this to explain things to Kashuu or for himself. ) Just ignore it.

( Pretend he never said anything. He feels tense and really, it's the last thing he should be feeling given his injuries. Everything feels sore but he can't possibly relax right now. He's painfully aware of his injuries right now and he grinds his teeth, trying to get through it. )

It's fast.

( The memory. Is it lucky that his worst memory is one of his shortest? It'll pass quickly enough. It doesn't make it any easier and the memory strikes, sudden and violently like the very nature of the memory. He visibly flinches, hands moving to hold his sides, and he seems to curl into himself in response to the memory. It has his blood rushing and he can feel himself getting warmer. )

( He feels so sore when his body is tense like this. The last battle hadn't been a kind one and Mutsu had come out with his fair share of cuts and bruises. Really, the fight had been rough enough and then he had to go and get himself thrown across the street too? He's lucky his opponent had used his energy to send him flying instead of actually breaking him on the spot.

Doudanuki's movements register but only barely. It's really hard to tell what's real and isn't right now and when he hears a voice so close to him, he jumps turning his attention to him. His eyes are bright and alert but hardly focused, looking at him almost as if he was a stranger before recognizing the other sword, )

I'm fine. ( A blatant lie but he's always been the one to downplay his injuries for the sake of not worrying others. ) Just... remembering things, ya know?

( He doesn't really need to explain but he can't help it. Looking down at his hands, closing tightly around his cup, )

... It's fast. ( His memory and the delirium it triggers. ) It'll be over before ya know it.

( And maybe he's saying this for himself too. )

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damaged

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b!!

look at that kiwame donut

8( <-- it's the only way he knows how to look

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